I used to think hypergamy was just some bullsh*t, toxic manosphere ideology.
You know the type:
“She only wants a man with money, status, and looks.”
“Women are disloyal.”
“Hypergamy means she’ll leave you the second she meets someone better.”
That kind of rhetoric always rubbed me the wrong way.
It was bitter. Angry. And honestly, reactive as hell.
But if I’m being real with you…
The “conscious men’s space” online wasn’t much better.
It was all heart, no edge.
All presence, no polarity.
They told men to just “hold space” and “open their heart” while ignoring every biological and psychological pattern that still governs attraction.
And me being me, I couldn’t swallow either pill.
So I studied both.
I dove deep into the spiritual development side.
I absorbed the red-pill logic.
I filtered both through lived experience.
And I landed here.
A grounded, emotionally intelligent, and brutally honest take on hypergamy and how men can use it to evolve, not resent it.
1. Hypergamy is not evil. It’s evolutionary.
Hypergamy is simply a woman’s instinct to choose the best possible man available to her.
Not just financially, but emotionally, energetically, socially,and spiritually.
If that makes you flinch, it means there’s a part of you that still believes you’re not enough.
That part doesn’t need to be shamed. It needs to be led.
Because at the core, she’s not rejecting you, she’s responding to your trajectory.
She’s attracted to direction. Motion. Growth.
And the more grounded you are in your path, the more naturally women calibrate to your energy.
2. Hypergamy is not the enemy. Stagnation is.
You don’t need to be a millionaire or have a six-pack to be chosen.
You need to be in motion.
You need to be rooted in your mission.
You need to be walking proof that your best days are still ahead of you.
That’s what pulls a high-quality woman in.
She doesn’t want a perfect man; she wants a man who doesn’t wait for permission to grow.
3. Gamify it. Make it fun.
Don’t resent hypergamy. Play with it.
When a woman challenges you, tests your energy, or gives mixed signals… lean back and smile.
That’s the game. That’s the dance.
She’s not trying to manipulate you. She’s trying to feel you.
Your depth. Your leadership. Your response to tension.
So treat every moment like social alchemy.
How fun can you make the process of outgrowing yesterday’s self?
4. Be the man who enjoys the chase, without needing to chase.
A king doesn’t compete. He selects.
You’re not proving your worth to women.
You’re choosing who gets access to your world.
That’s the shift.
The more you embody this, the more hypergamy works in your favor.
Because while most men are stuck reacting to it, you’re the one evolving through it.
You feel that? That’s your power coming online.
And this is just the beginning.
| Much love, Shawn “Sheshn” Heshmatpour |
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