| Hey there, One thing I want to write about for you this morning is the difference between therapy and the type of work I do. I’ve been asked this by so many guys who’ve hopped on consultation calls with me over the years. A lot of the men I’ve worked with are familiar with the “therapy” side of what I do (I am not a therapist, btw, but my coaching modalities cross over with cognitive behavior, conscious psychology, and the subconscious mind). Here’s what therapy offers… You work through your old patterns, understand where they come from, and understand it’s okay to feel the feelings that come with them. That’s great! But that’s all therapy can help you accomplish. This is why so many men who’ve done therapy can get stuck on the feeling/healing part of their journey. This doesn’t help you make more money. This doesn’t help you overcome social anxiety. This doesn’t help you become confident with women. This doesn’t help you shape you into the MAN you want to become. But you know what does? Working with a coach who can help you craft your NEW IDENTITY. You can feel your feelings all day. In fact, I still do it all the time! YOU SHOULD BE FEELING YOUR FEELING BRO! But what good is feeling your traumatic patterns 24/7 if you don’t have the tools to shift your inner dialogue into thoughts and behaviors that serve THE IDENTITY OF THE MAN YOU WANT TO BECOME? Nothing. That’s what identity & performance work is all about. I’ve seen this firsthand in my own life for 6+ years. I’ve seen this with my clients for 4.5+ years. Who you INTENTIONALLY BECOME is what YOU INTENTIONALLY RECEIVE when it comes to your goals: – Increasing your income. – Going on first dates where you FEEL GOOD afterwards.- The new business idea or creative project you want to execute. – Expanding your network and social circle to match the type of people you want to be around. These outcomes in your life that you desire are branches grown from the root that is YOU… who you are BEING. Therapy is about processing the past. Coaching is about learning the tools to shift out of the past and start creating new thoughts, feelings, and actions until they become a natural part of who you are. When your new identity (who you are being) becomes a natural part of who you are. |
| Much love, Shawn “Sheshn” Heshmatpour |
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