Let’s be real.
Most men don’t actually hate the gym, the grind, or the game of dating.
They just hate not getting what they want fast enough.
That’s why they tap out.
You hit the gym for 3 weeks, and your abs still look like mashed potatoes.
You go on 4 dates, and none of them are your dream girl.
You post on Instagram twice and wonder why your DMs aren’t filled with buyers.
So you start telling yourself, “I don’t know if this is working.”
Bro it’s not that it’s not working.
It’s that you’re acting like the outcome owes you something.
Here’s what no one told you:
If you don’t love the process, you’ll sabotage the results.
Let’s break it down.
1. When you obsess over the outcome, you start acting like a phony.
- In dating: You over-calibrate every text like it’s a hostage negotiation. You’re not being flirty, you’re being weird.
- In social circles: You show up trying to be “cool” instead of just showing up as a man with value.
- In business: You post shit that sounds like a self-help book nobody asked for, hoping someone will beg to pay you.
Nobody wants to buy, follow, or sleep with someone who’s trying too hard.
Especially when it reeks of insecurity.
2. When you’re attached to results, you start performing instead of living.
- On dates: You lose your edge trying to be liked. That’s not seductive—that’s self-abandonment.
- With people: You say yes to shit you don’t want to do just to get approval.
- With business: You shrink your voice. Play it safe. Package your offer like a clearance sale at TJ Maxx.
You stop moving like a man.
And start moving like a boy waiting for permission.
3. When you tie your worth to results, you lose power every time things don’t go your way.
- One rejection = I’m not attractive
- One failed pitch = My business sucks
- One cold interaction = I’m not meant for this
That’s how most men kill their momentum.
Not from failure.
From emotional fragility.
They can’t stomach a slow start because their entire identity is tied to the outcome.
This is the truth:
Your thoughts create your emotional tone.
Your emotional tone shapes how you show up.
And how you show up determines your results.
So if your thoughts are stuck on “Why haven’t I gotten it yet?”
Your entire energy becomes desperate, needy, and outcome-chasing.
You’re no longer a man moving toward a mission.
You’re just a dude panicking because reality didn’t clap for him fast enough.
You have to rewire your mind to love the grind.
The gym. The sales. The rejections. The silence.
You have to enjoy showing up when no one’s watching, applauding, or validating.
That’s how real power gets built.
That’s how real results compound.
That’s how men separate from boys.
And that’s exactly what we do inside Divine Alchemy.
It’s not a place for guys looking for quick wins.
It’s a brotherhood for men who want to dominate the long game.
Internally. Externally. Permanently.
Much love,
Shawn “Sheshn” Heshmatpour
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